Rhadi, Traci, and Rufus Ferguson

Tuesday, October 25, 2011

The Dr. Rhadi Ferguson Official Homecoming 2011 Recap and Homecoming 2012 Message

HOMECOMING 2011



This year was different.



After coming off of a specatular 2010 Homecoming, I was trying to out do 2010 in 2011. I found myself trying to "force" homecoming. I was trying to "make" the experience something that it wasn't.



The truth of the matter is this... no matter how much my ego doesn't want to admit it..the truth is.. Howard doesn't NEED me to be live. She was "live" before I got there, she's "live" now and she'll be "live" when we leave here.



We were blessed to have the opportunity to allow our feet to brush upon the landscape of greatness of the campus. We were privilege to sit in the seats where great minds, hearts and spirits have been built, nurtured and matured. We were fortunate to spend time with one another and become part of Howard's family. And somewhere along the lines of all the partying and playing. I forgot that.



I forgot that Homecoming is meant for me to go "home" not "go out."



Nothing, trumps the yard experience. Nothing. Not Bobby and his van, the Love, not Diddy, not the Park, Indulj, an afterset, a party, a jumpoff, some fresh bait. NOTHING!!!



So I struggled as homecoming drew near because I'm in the "tweener" stage. I'm at the point where I don't want to let the party go, but I know the time is coming.



See, as we get older our homecomings become more exclusive. They are parties but the people decrease. We need to sit more because our feet hurt due to the fact that were are classier now so we wear classy shoes and with that we need to sit. It has nothing to do with age. Believe me. If the ladies wore flats all weekend they'd be fine, but they do not.



Why?



Well, because flats are for the FAMUs and Alabama A&Ms of the world.... not Howard. :-) Our Bison Queens wear stilettos and high heeled shoes (with red bottoms) with a price tag upwards of $250 and it has nothing to do with being pretentious, it's just where we are in life as........... Howard Grads.



And with that being said, we no longer want to be bumped when we go into the club.



We don't do lines or line drama.



We don't wanna wait for drinks and we have zero desire to be inconvenienced.



We are not 18, 19, or 20.



And this is what many are realizing. This is what I realized before homecoming.



So I struggled as homecoming drew near because I'm in the "tweener" stage. I'm at the point where I don't want to let the party go, but I know the time is coming.



In 2010 I could remember how tired I was on Sunday after "pushing" so hard on Saturday night. This year, I began to ask myself, "Why?"



Why push?



Just rest.



Just relax.



Just enjoy the person you are with and make love to the Howard Experience.



Hold it, Massage it.



Caress it. Love it.



And then lay in it. Its soft. (PAUSE)



It's soulful.



It's Howard.



There's no need to rush. To go from club to club to club to club.



I had to realize this. I had to learn that it's okay for me to "saddown somewhere" and relax and just enjoy the company I am with.



I was dealing with this before homecoming.



So I struggled as homecoming drew near because I'm in the "tweener" stage. I'm at the point where I don't want to let the party go, but I know the time is coming.



As homecoming was getting closer I began to think about what was important. I reflected on the times I had in school and I thought about the people that I helped and the people that NEEDED my help and those that helped me.



And those people were not going to be in the club. They were in hotels. On the yard. In restaurants, and at the football game.



I had to think about the young woman in school who I watched get pregnant, stay in school, graduate and become a professor. And who's children that I absolutely love and adore. - Professor Jefferson.



I thought about the man who went to Howard for 6 years, had his classes purged every semester because his money "wasn't online" and is the Godfather to my two children and is now a professor of chemistry. - Dr. Stewart



I thought about the woman who mentored me and showed me the ropes in school and is one who I respect and love and is my son's Godmother. - Dr. Rone Wilson



I thought about the Coach that has produced more PhDs per capita than any Howard University Coach in the past 25 years. - Dr.Paul Cotton.



I thought about what it was like to line up on Saturda's and play for the Bison. And what it feels like to watch the fellas that I played with, now coach the Bison. - Flea, Ted, Billy, and Bobby.



As Homecoming drew near I thought about all of this.



And although I remembered the times that I partied.... the Quigley's, the Ritz, Zei Street, etc.,..... those aren't the things that I "remember"



So I struggled as homecoming drew near because I'm in the "tweener" stage. I'm at the point where I don't want to let the party go, but I know the time is coming.



What I remember is the night during my freshman year that me and Brent Hughes had solid "F's" in physics and missed what was probably the livest party of our Howard matriculation period which was happening the night before our test and we could not go because we were studying.



We both aced the test.



We missed the party.



But we aced the test.



This is what I remember.



I remember the time when I got a phone call letting me know that one of my teammates had been shot and killed and I thought about how each day is precious and how he could no longer line up for the Bison when I was in school. So I treasured the days when I practiced, even in the cold, because he could no longer play. (R.I.P. #29, Derrick Wynn)



I remember going to the mental institution to see one of my teammates that had a bipolar disorder.



I remember studying in the library with Kevin Thompson and struggling in Calculus 3 with Lenford Lloyd.



I remember the first time I really connected with Winston Williams and he let me borrow $800.00 to go to summer school and I paid him back in a check and added some extra to the money for his troubles. He dug in his pocket and gave me the diference for the overage and said,"Bro. that defeats the purpose of us being friends!" He let me borrow $800.00 and would only accept $800.00 in return. I tear up thinking about this now because I love him so much and I should tell him more but I don't.



These are the things I remember. And I KNOW I partied at Howard, but those things aren't the things that I remember.



Those things aren't that important. Really they aren't.



(....and please keep this in mind as you go from club to club to club looking for the "livest" party. Just stop and observe who is in the car or the cab with you and realize YOU are already a part of the "livest" party because you are around your friends. It wouldn't matter if you parked the car on 9th and P and sat there and talked. Your HOMECOMING WOULD BE GREAT!!!! I had to remind my friend of this as she complained about traffic. I said, "Hey, we are in the traffic together. This beats talking to you on the phone. Relax and enjoy the traffic with me. It's homecoming.")



So I struggled as homecoming drew near because I'm in the "tweener" stage. I'm at the point where I don't want to let the party go, but I know the time is coming.



I know I have to let the party go. But I hold on to it and tell myself, "Oh I wanna go to this party because that's where all my friends are gonna be." When the truth of the matter is this.



At Howard, the Ques, meet at the dial, the AKAs meet by their tree, the Deltas meet on their plot, the fine arts students sit in front of the fine arts building, the Kappas are by their tree, the football players are by the trees and benches when you come on to the yard and in front of cook hall, the athletes are in and out of burr, the freshman are in drew and the quad, the engineering students are in lewis k. downing, the school of b students in the school of business, the communications students in the school of C, the science students are in the valley and......YOU GET MY POINT.



EVERYBODY IS ON THE YARD.



With that being said. This year as I was fielding all the phone calls and the texts and trying to "force" homecoming and actually blowing my homecoming high unnecessarily...... I said, "F#$% IT!!!!" I am NOT running to any club to see people.



The PEOPLE are on the yard.



I see my wrestling coach - Dr. Cotton EVERY year and we never call. We never talk, we never even address meeting up at homecoming.



You know why?



Because his ass, just like mine, is ON THE YARD!!!!!



This is what I had to understand.



This is what I had to digest.



This is what I was fighting.



This was MY problem.



So I struggled as homecoming drew near because I'm in the "tweener" stage. I'm at the point where I don't want to let the party go, but I know the time is coming.



As I stood on the yard about 50 yards away from the stage I could hear Whodini rapping that old song, "Friends.......how many of us have them? Friends? Before we go any further lets be friends."



And I looked over at my friend Shay and her daughter Amani and her other daughter and I said to myself. I am hanging out with someone that I have known for 17 years. Who grew up with some of the same people that I grew up with in Miami. I looked at her daughter and said to myself, "Damn, I played football with her father. And I said to myself, "Okay, I got it. THIS is homecoming. This is what its about. It's a reunion. NOT a party." There maybe some partying in it but it's not about the party. NOT for us. Not for the real Bison.



And at that moment I realized that I was exactly where I needed to be.



As homecoming approached, I made a change.



I picked who I wanted to hang with.



Decided who I wanted to see and how I was going to spend my time.



And on everything else I let the chips fall where they may.



I'm at the point now where I'm not leaving the game to go somewhere else. Hell, if I leave the game early, I don't see Krystal Randolph who is a dear friend, who was one of the athletic trainers in 1996 when we won the Black College National Championship. She showed me her ring on the sideline and I know the thought that went into putting in on as she came to the game. These are the things that homecoming are about. THIS!



I LIVE to sing that Alma Mater on the field after the game. And cannot wait until my son lines up and sings it with me because he KNOWS IT NOW. :-)



And I'm not leaving the yard to go rest.



I will rest from the rest of that stuff, but I will be where I am supposed to be.



I will be at Howard University ON THE YARD.....



AT HOME!!!!!!!!



As we get older, its the only place that we can guarantee that we will see each other. So there's no need to ask me what party I'm going to in 2012. If you wanna meet, you know where I'll be.



I'll be.....on the yard!!!! (and the tailgate will also suffice).



I'm sure I will struggle my way through homecoming during this tweener stage because I am at the point where I don't want to let the party go.



But like that light at the end of the tunnel....which is a train... I know it's coming!



And I want to say this..... every year we are blessed to see each other. Some folks did not make it this year. The yard is ever changing and ever morphing. We are just holding a spot for a period of time. Next year, hold yours down. And, Lord willing, I'll see you..... on the yard.



I LOVE YOU! I MISS YOU! AND MOST IMPORTANLY I RESPECT YOU!



BISON!!!!



*** R.I.P. Zandi!! She was NOT on the yard this year :-( We miss you and love you!! ***



Let's start trending this now..... #HUHC2012 and follow me at @HUHC2012 on twitter. Let's get it in!



http://www.twitter.com/huhc2012

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